De Omnibus Dubitandum Est.

I cannot help but feel deeply moved by the very experience of being in Lourdes. This small town in the Pyrenean foothills has played an essential and dynamic role in my life and the life of the small family I have built to date. It is the place I met my beloved wife, Louise, the place where we first kissed, and where we have travelled to together many times since. For the last three years, since our oldest two boys have been old enough to follow in our footsteps and come with the diocese to spend the week in service to the elderly and handicapped, it has become the focal point for our annual gathering to mourn the loss of Ruth and to thank God for her life. It is difficult every year, I wish I could say that it gets easier...But it doesn't. I think we get better at dealing with the raw onslaught of annual emotion, the day when we face head on the stark reality of her absence. I am sure some people think "just get over it" after six years, but I do not feel the need...

Gathered together for prayers at the Grotto on Ruth's Anniversary 2014 The week before last was the Brentwood Diocesan Pilgrimage to Lourdes and I must apologise that I have only just managed to finally finish my blog on the trip. This event annually coincides with Brentwood Catholic Youth Service' s annual Summer Lourdes Pilgrimage. The Youth Service goes to Lourdes in Spring too, but Summer is the big pilgrimage, with four coach loads of young people heading off to help our VIP's in whatever way they can. There's a nice bit on BBC iPlayer here , from Peter Holmes' show on Sunday, which features the Bishop , Fr. James , Roisin and my son Michael (amongst others). Both of my oldest sons joined them for the second time, but the pilgrimage also coincided with the 5th anniversary of my daughter Ruth's tragic death and we really did not want to be apart as a family for this day. As much as I want it to fade into ignominy as a date, it never fails to sneak u...

One year on from the birth of Mary Thérèse, four years since we lost our Ruthie. It was suggested by several friends that I write something to commemorate the occasion. It was also suggested that the Catholic Herald might be interested in publishing the piece, which they were, and did! It is my hope that this will reach out to others who are struggling to deal with a bereavement and give them the confidence to put all their trust in God. Click on the image for full size This is the article as I originally wrote it: As we entered the month of July, my mind began to fizz and whir in an attempt to deal with the confluence of emotions which assail it. July is the month of the fatal car accident which killed my darling daughter Ruth in 2009. It is also the month Michael and John were born, and, on the 27th last year, my daughter Mary, the antidote to my devastation at the loss of Ruth, was born. I can't believe this year has gone so quickly, looking at Mary I feel so b...